D&L Music Review 01: Eating's Not Cheating (mc chris)

I don't know anything about music, but I'll run my punk mouth any way.

Track 1 - mc chris ownz

This opener introduces us to mc's ego (mc chris ownz, I got bling up the ying - a plethora of Porsches, etc...), his sex obsessed side (Latinas on my penis, Japanese on they knees, I love all the ladies, as long as they eighteen), his drug preferences (Humidors filled with stoges filled with dro, I'm lit like a branch davidian), his geekiness (When I roll up in Kashyyyk I roll three Jedi's deep), and his mastery of reference dropping (1337-speak, Mob mythology, Star Wars (twice), 90210, The Waco Siege, Go, Kurt Cobain, The former DNC Chairman, The Matrix, Late '70s TV, and probably a few more).

In short, it's a perfect intro to mc. Musically, it's got a beat that pumps me up and a weird ringing part that sounds oddly familiar.

Track 2 - Badass

This track is blisteringly fast until the end... I love the guitar in this one, but the lyrics don't really grab me. Sometimes I find the extended telling-off at the end humerous; other times it's annoying.

Track 3 - Tractor Beam

Song's pretty simple, being all about sex, but there are a few funny points and the beat makes me want to move. I start to dance listening to this song... at least, as much as any one can dance sitting down.

Track 4 - Robot Dog

I love this song. It's so funny. The narrator, allergic to every breed of dog, orders a robotic one from Japan... He's dissapointed, though, when the dog turns against him. The dog steals all the owner's potential ladies, eats filet mignon while the owner eats alphabits (and only the consonents!), and goes in the club while his owner waits in the car...

Track 5 - Evergreen

This song's about a guy who chops and moves christmas trees, drinking, doing drugs, and chasing chicks all the while. Another catchy beat.

Well, that's under half the tracks but I have work to do and it's running late.
I'll do the rest later, folks.